Guilt of a Savior
by MrGopher77
Summary: "When you are alone for this long, there is no hiding from your thoughts, you simply become numb to them and then slowly turn into a shell of the person you once were. That is, unless you can find something to live for."
1. Chapter 1

**UPDATE: This was originally the second chapter but I am now swapped it with the first. I feel as if the first chapter gave to much of a "childish" image of the piece and I felt as if new readers were not giving both chapters a chance after being deterred by the first chapter. This chapter sets the tone better for the rest of the story.**

 **AN: Yep so this chapter took a while. I had actually started writing the next chapter immediately following the last one in regards to the timeline but I wanted to jump into the grittiness of life alone in the wilds of Remnant first instead. The song that is mentioned later in the chapter is "Lua" by Bright Eyes.**

 _ **Chapter 1: Broken Man, Burning Village**_

The young man took a long drag from one of his few remaining cigarettes. On the first drag of every cigarette, a memory of a conversation he once had always seemed to come to him. He had asked his uncle why he smoked, claiming it would eventually kill him, to which his uncle replied, "Boy, there are demons inside me that need killin', and if I die because of it, well, we'll just call that a negative side effect to a necessary evil." He stated before taking another drag and then slamming the butt into an ash tray. After 5 years of confusion, he finally understood what his uncle meant.

The man walking wearily down the snow-covered trail may share the same identity as the boy who had awoken in the forest 6 months prior, but he was not the same person.

When you are alone for this long, there is no hiding from your thoughts, you simply become numb to them and then slowly turn into a shell of the person you once were. That is, unless you can find something to live for.

Take a drag, walk some steps, exhale, repeat. This is the now familiar pattern the man has developed through his 6 months of travel. Limiting himself to one per week, he has been able to drag out the package containing 25 for months now but it was beginning to dwindle.

Pushing the worry from his mind, the man again focused his attention solely on the object of his addiction.

"Ah! Fuck!" While caught up in the moment of tranquility surrounding his leisurely activity, he grew careless and allowed the smolder to burn past the filter and reach his fingers.

Throwing the butt to the ground and smashing it with the heel of his shoe, the man proceeded to mentally count off the hours until he could partake in his weekly vice again.

He walked along for a few more hours in silence before his stomach began to growl signalling that it was time for lunch. He set down his sea bag with a solid *thunk* before pulling out a canteen and some dried deer meat wrapped in leather to protect it from the elements. He had tried to harvest those….things...for their meat but they seemed to dissolve to ash almost immediately after death.

He had become a very skilled hunter out of necessity. During the winter months, vegetation was scarce which, in turn, meant food was scarce.

He had never been hunting back in his world, unless you count prairie dogs which are more of a pest than anything. Despite having the aptitude of a great archer and rifleman, killing had never been something he had been too keen on doing, though now, any qualms about killing had been quickly crushed under the need for survival even before he arrived in this world.

He swallowed the thoughts along with the piece of meat he had been chewing.

He had no time to think about that now, during the waking hours. Those thoughts would torment him in his restless dreams that night anyway, so what point was there in letting it bother him now.

Realizing how parched his throat was, he quickly took a long, satisfying gulp from his canteen.

Ah yes water, another one of his new-found loves. Best of all, it was everywhere now. No longer does he have to go searching for reservoirs or collect rain water. Just toss some snow in a bucket, melt and boil it and done. Water.

After finishing his swallow, he put the lid on the canteen, but not before giving the outside a very powerful, faux-passionate kiss ending with a loud *smack*.

Food, water, and cigarettes are all he desired in this world now. Some people are more partial to alcohol, cigarettes as their sole enjoyments in life but he had never really liked alcohol back where he was from. Too bitter.

He lay back and let the sound of the bitter winter wind lap in his ears. He pulled out his carton of cigarettes and smelled the oooh so delicious insides. Catching himself breaking his promise of one a week, he shoved them back in his pocket disgruntled. Withdrawal sucks.

 _It isn't something I would recommend, but it is one way to live._ He thought, mentally reciting lyrics from a song he used to enjoy so many months ago despite not fully grasping the concepts described to him through the melody. He _thought_ he knew pain to the severest degree back then. If given the choice to rid the pain he now felt in exchange for the sorrow he used to bare, he would take it in a heartbeat. The nightmares he now faced nightly make his old bothers look like child's play.

Standing up now and throwing the sea bag straps over his shoulders, the man resumes his walking while simultaneously chewing on a stick of dried meat he had hanging from his mouth.

As the path began winding along a hillside, the man could make out subtle hints of smoke rising from a clearing in the trees. Nothing makes fire out here except humans and lightning. There has been no lightning for weeks now.

Dashing forward now, invigorated by the prospect of seeing his first humans since he first woke up in this hell forsaken place.

There was a T in the road ahead. The section breaking off from the main road was obviously the path into the village. The man turned making a hard left onto the path that seemed to cut right down the center of the forest towards the mountain. He could smell it now. The remnants in the air of a large wood fire. Whatever it was, it must've been massive.

Still sprinting down the snow-covered road, his toned, muscular body chiseled from months of relying on physical strength for survival carrying him swiftly down the path, he could start to view the outline of a large gate, the main gate to the village.

As he got closer to his intended destination he suddenly stopped. The piece of meat he had been gnawing on fell into the snow as his mouth hung open in horror and his stomach began to feel queasy.

The sight before him was nothing short of a bloody massacre.

A large portion of the stone and wood wall, once standing proudly, was knocked over into the snow with the gate still closed and standing on its own. Walking through the hole in the defensive structure, even more carnage came into view.

Homes and storehouses lay in smoldering ruin. None remained standing and few showed any signs of being spared from the truly massive fire that must've laid siege to this town.

But worst of all were the bodies, oh god the bodies. Laying in the streets were the remnants of wolf, bear and bird monsters, all turned to ashy ruin which blackened the pure white snow. They must've poured into the city after the fall of the wall.

Alongside them we human bodies strewn about. Blood reddening the snow around them all.

Men, women, children, elderly, all lay in various stages of dismemberment on the streets and sidewalks before him.

His mind was beginning to shut down from the horrific sights in front of him. He would have passed out too if it wasn't for one, single, sound ringing out among the silence of the now desolate town.

Yes, he heard it now, a hoarse cry of help from an adult woman now mixed with the soft crying of a child.

Running in the direction the sound resonated from, he was not prepared for the sight before him.

"Oh shit."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Ready Player One**

 _Where the fuck am I?_ Was the first question to register in the mind of the 14 year old boy currently lying facedown on the cold forest floor. He sat up while rubbing the sleep from his tired eyes.

 _Got to think. Got to think. What happened last? School. Ah yes, I was at school._ Gunfire. Panic. Vengeance. Vengeance for a fallen friend. A fallen brother. A blood curdling scream. A bloody scissors grasped tightly in a trembling hand.

Memories came rushing back as screams of agony flowed from the boy filling the previously still forest air. The screaming slowly subsided as black began to obscure the boy's vision and the unnatural silence again overtook the surrounding forest.

The boy regained consciousness several hours later with the once glowing skyline now beginning to fade vaguely hinting at the impending dark now poised to overtake the land.

 _I need to find shelter._ The boy thought as he crawled to his feet and began to observe his surroundings, all thoughts of the past now muted as his instincts to survive kicked in. He soon realized he was in a lush, green forest filled with inconceivably tall trees. The forest floor was covered in tall grass not unlike that of which covered the plains and valleys where he grew up.

Amidst his gazing through the thick underbrush, the boy noticed a clearing less than 250 feet ahead. As he made his way through the foliage he could make out the purple outline of what appears to be... _what the hell is that doing here._

The boy, moving quickly now in order to confirm a suspicion he now had in the quickest possible manner, was now sprinting through the leaves and grass at top speed.

As he hurdled over bush upon bush and low hanging tree branch upon low hanging tree branch at the break neck speed initially set at the start of his little run, he soon began closing in on his intended destination.

Now only a mere 20 feet from his intended target, one last jump to make and….his foot snagged on a tree branch and sent him tumbling out of the dim forest and into the light filled clearing.

Quickly getting to his feet after that suave display of agility, the boy was filled him with delight mixed with a subtle hint of confusion towards the subject of his gaze.

A purple pickup sat in the center of the clearing. HIS purple quarter ton pickup sat in the center of the clearing.

 _So that's here with me now too, apparently. I guess you decided to not totally screw me today, huh universe?_

At that moment, as if out of sheer spite for the boy, a creature vaguely resembling a werewolf stalks out of the trees on the other side of the clearing smelling for a scent still not aware of the boy's presence. Now crouching low to avoid being scene, the boy takes a closer look at the creature.

Jet black fur, a bonelike mask on its face along with multiple spines of the same material along its body, and worst of all, those beady, red, soulless eyes filled with enough raw hatred to send a chill through his spine.

 _One day of football practice don't fail me now!_ The boy thinking as his impulses took over and he grabbed a rock from the ground and chucked it as high and as far as he could into the woods beyond the terrifying wolf monster.

The rock smacked with a loud *crack* high in a tree a solid 30 feet deep within the trees. The beast quickly turned in the direction of the sounds before dashing off to investigate leaving the quick witted boy alone in the clearing now cringing from a sudden soreness in his shoulder.

Pulling up his shirt sleeve he discovered a scarred over bullet entry wound on the front side of his body and a bullet exit wound on the opposite side near his shoulder blade. _Well that's new._ He thought to himself before quickly pushing the thought out of his head and returning his attention to the matter at hand. Survival.

The boy slowly made his way to the driver's side door of the pickup while still maintain his crouched form. Just as he made it to the side of the truck, he quickly inches his eyes above the side so he was now looking where the monster had previously been. _No sign of him, good._

Slinking back down into a crouched position, the boy tried the door handle. To his dismay, it was locked. Panic began to set in as the boy realized he may have no silent way to ever ent-... _oh wait keys._

He again crawled towards the back of the truck, glancing over at the tree line again before opening up the gas tank cover and retrieving a single chrome key sealed in a ziplock bag and taped to the inside of the cover. Grabbing the key, the boy then crawled back to the door, inserted the key, and unlocked the door with a satisfying *click*.

After unlocking the vehicle the boy quickly scanned his surroundings before quickly opening the door, throwing himself into the seat and pressing the lock button with a content sigh. _Safe at last._


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Enter Sandman**

The boy had been sitting in the calm atmosphere of the pickup for almost 10 minutes now. The peace of mind involved with being in an area safer than the now pitch black woods almost made him forget about the big scary wolf monster among the trees. Almost. One doesn't simply forget a sight like that in their lifetime. He wasn't afraid of much but that...that thing, made him sick to his stomach.

The wind had picked up, causing the pickup to rock lightly back and forth with each gust. The night sky was starless with the only light being that of which streamed from the broken moon. _Broken moon!? This place is weird._

After another few minutes of rest, he sat his seat up with a tinge of reluctance in his movements. _I guess inventory is the first thing I should do, that's what they do on all those survivor shows anyway._

He shoved his hands into the pockets of his blue jeans and pulled out all the contents and set them on his lap, then, picking first out of the bunch his phone, he turned it on yielding the familiar startup sound. _As suspected, no service._

Using the phone's screen as a flashlight, he then began to investigate the rest of his pocket's contents. _Wallet. Keys. Pocket change._ After shoving the mostly useless items back in his pockets he began rummaging through the glove box and center console yielding a swiss army knife and a tin of mints.

He threw a handful of mints in his mouth before turning his body around so he could rummage through the backseat of the vehicle. _Black leather coat. Opened bag of beef jerky. Acoustic guitar. His sea bag._

Settling back into his seat, the boy was not overly happy with his findings but satisfied, it would make survival just a little bit easier than it was before no matter how marginally of a difference it was. _Oh wait!_ Looking in his rearview mirror he confirmed that his tool box was still suspended between the walls of his pickup bed along with a gas welding cart his dad stuck in his pickup to use in the field.

Letting out a yawn, the boy opted to simply check it in the morning. Besides, it was better to be spotted by a wolf monster in broad daylight where it could be visible rather than at night where he could be, I don't know, mauled to death and not even see it coming. Forgetting his worries about his current situation, he drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

The boy awoke to the soundscape of the loud beeping of the alarm clock on his phone, shouts to "wake the hell up" from his mom, and the loud slam of his home's front door.

Rubbing his eyes with one hand, he reached over with his other to grab his phone. After silencing the wretched thing that woke him from such beautiful slumber, he glanced at the time. 7:15.

"Ah fuck, Imma be late for that Pre-Algebra study session," he stated matter of factly. It wasn't that he didn't give a shit about school and good grades. It was that he didn't give MUCH of a shit about school and good grades.

Climbing out of bed, he decided to at least make it look like he was trying to be on time. Throwing on some socks, boxers, jeans, and a black band t-shirt with a green button up over top, He was almost ready to face the world.

Shoving his phone in his pocket and dashing to the bathroom, he took care of his morning hygiene ritual before grabbing a pop tart and bolting out the door.

Once outside he hopped the railing on the deck and jogged to his pickup as he pet the top of his two dogs heads. As soon as he was inside, the engine roared to life and his phone was connected to the auxiliary cord post haste. The song "Into The Sun" by Parlor Mob began to blare over the speakers.

All my life I've been chasing something  
I feel fate breathing down my neck  
If the road I'm on somehow leads me nowhere  
No retreats men no regrets

'Cause I'm not going to break  
and there ain't no mistakes  
and there ain't no turning back

Out of the darkness  
And into the light of love  
Though for now it seems this struggle has only begun

I'm still believing  
Our day is going to come  
When we step out of the shadows and into the sun  
Into the sun

Say a prayer for a generation  
Hope is frail in this modern times  
In a cold world of complication  
I refuse to be left behind

And I'm not going to break  
Nobody can take  
This feeling from my soul

Out of the darkness  
And into the light of love  
Though for now it seems this struggle has only begun

I'm still believing  
Our day is going to come  
When we step out of the shadows and into the sun  
Into the suuuuuuuuuuuuuuun  
Into the suuuuuuuuuuuuuuun

Out of the darkness  
And into the light of love  
Though for now it seems this struggle has only begun

I'm still believing  
Our day is going to come  
When we step out of the shadows and into the sun  
Into the sun

The song came to a close minutes later as he began to round a curve in the road, flying 75 in a 65 zone. At that moment a black blur appeared in his peripheral vision just before slamming into the side of his truck as his eyes screwed shut only to open to... _a broken moon and the darkness of night!?_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Trial By Fire**

Ripped from his slumber, the boy could only yell while he bounced around the inside the pickup as it was rolled multiple times. It finally came to a stop...upside down. Getting his bearings after slamming his head so many times, a thought struck him. _What the fuck did THAT?!_

His question was soon answered as a familiar bone covered face starred in the side drivers side window snarling. Jumping to action the boy flopped to the passenger seat as a claw came smashing through the window and pulled back, tearing part of the door off.

In a sudden attempt at LIVING, the boy popped open the passenger side door before scrambling out into the night. He surveyed his surroundings and found tools scattered across the ground. After grabbing an axe, he readied himself for a final stand.

And a final stand he would have as the pitch black beast barrelled over the toppled vehicle ready to kill. That is to say, if the beast had done that, instead of simply launching the truck the boy, knocking him flat on his ass as he narrowly avoided being crushed. The beast descended upon him ready to tear at flesh. The boy tucked the axe to his chest and rolled to the side before landing a solid hit to its side as he sat up.

The beast roared before swatting him with its paw sending him flying across the field until he came to an abrupt stop, slamming his back into the pickup. The beast began to slowly move towards the boy, enjoying watching its soon to be prey squirm under its gaze.

The weak human squirmed on the ground looking for anything to fend off that beast. That is, until a smirk appeared on the boy's face. "Aye buddy! You ever watch Jaws?" Immediately following were the loud sounds of a metal on metal hit, the sound of rushing air, and a sickening squelching sound as a large, blunt object tore through flesh and rocketed into the night.

The boy sat in silence as he stared right through a hole in the monsters midsection at the silver moonlight. Its lifeless body toppled to the ground as it began to disintegrate into a black ash. As pained laughter began to ring out through the night.

He had done it, he had won! And all it took was some dumb luck and a stray canister of compressed oxygen from his dad's welding cart. He had knocked the regulator stem creating what was virtually a metal rocket as it accelerated towards his enemy.

As the adrenaline began to wear off, swearing and cries of pain could be heard through the woods that night.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Numb**

"Oh Shit"

Before him was a collapsed house lying in ruin. A section of roof lay where the kitchen should be. Studs, once in walls, now turned to jagged spikes. Beds, couches once so clean now covered with ash and dirt. But the sight that disturbed him the most lay, legs caught under rubble, embracing two young children.

A woman, who looked to be in her thirties, lay with tears streaming down her face. She looked at him with the most pleading eyes he had ever seen.

In an instant he was there next to her, lifting will all his might to pry the fallen support beam off of her. But his efforts were in vain as the massive pillar had not budged a single inch.

"I'll find a way to get you out of here!" the man shouted with urgency in his voice but the woman just shook her head and gave him a forced smile laced heavily with sadness. She gestured to the children sobbing into her shoulders.

"P-please" the woman managed to choke out "get them to safety. Take them to Vale, find their uncle Ben."

"No, I can't, I wouldn't know the first thing about taking care of kids."

"I haven't much time left, don't argue with me young man." She scolded. "I've lived a full enough life. Let them live one too".

The man came to an understanding and reached out to pick up the young boy as she pulled him from herself, gave him a kiss, whispered a few words in his ear, then lifted him up for the man to grab.

The boy immediately tried squirming away from the man while crying out to his mother before she silenced him with a quick "Hush."

The girl came a little easier, being older she grasped the situation more so it seemed. After saying some final goodbyes to her mother and sharing an embrace, the man leaned down to pick her up. She quickly put her hand up, "I can walk" she stated with a harshness in her voice.

"I love you both so much. I'm sorry. Now go, it will be night soon."

They turned to leave with the girl walking ahead looking rigid. As the man went to out of the ruble the woman whispered, "Hey."

He turned to look her in the eye. She made a gesture with her hand for him to lean his ear down for her to talk to him.

"Leave your knife here." She said, pointing to the throwing knife on his belt."

The look on his face was a look of pure puzzlement.

"Starvation is a painful death." She responded after noticing his confusion.

With a gulp and a stiff nod, the man dropped his knife on the ground and slid it to her under his foot in a weak attempt to hid it from the young girl who had stopped and looked back at the group.

He then turned and began walking away to catch up to the girl.

They walked through the blood splattered streets and through the hole in the wall. The wall that had once promised to protect this peaceful town.

He covered the boy's eyes through the entire ordeal but the girl, she saw it all. Walking in front of him, she never uttered a word. She didn't cry. She didn't panic when when stepped through the blood of a town guard. She merely keep walking forward in a daze.

 **I know it's kinda late...really late to be posting this. Any interest in this story is most likely gone from the people who enjoyed the first chapter. But, regardless, I decided to put out the rest of what I had, with some minor edits, so it wouldn't be stuck in my Google Drive for the rest of eternity. I'm getting back into writing and may attempt to finish this story. Anyway, hope you enjoy what writing I have done so far.**


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